I’ve been keeping up with my aims to do so many hours a month writing and working on my publishing ‘career’. Hah. It will maybe be that one day, but for now it feels quite a long way off.
However, I did take a big step this month. I applied for the right to have a secondary career/business interest at work.
For most people, this will be an unnecessary step. It’s not something most work places are bothered about, but mine is. For good reasons. Conflicts of interest and all that. I had to fill in a form and send it off to HR, which I have now done.
It might not seem like that much of a big step. But it was. Partly because the form was a pain in the neck – designed for people who want to get weekend work in a shop, not people launching a creative business of any kind. But also, it had to be given to my line manager to sign off. Which meant admitting to someone else, outside of my immediate family, that this is something that I want to do.
Obviously I talk about it on the blog all the time, but I find it different. You guys all understand because you’re either readers or writers. You love books, you love authors. My saying I want to be one is quite normal. I’ve always had this problem with confessing I want to be a writer to anyone in the ‘real’ world. I don’t really know why. It’s as fine an ambition as ‘running a marathon’ or ‘travel round the world’ or any of the other things people plan to do while trying to get on with ‘normal’ life at the same time. But while I’ll talk about wanting to get back up to Half Marathon fitness without embarrassment, confessing I want to publish a book feels like telling someone a dirty secret.
I guess it’s fear of failure. People assume that publishing a book is as simple as writing one. And how hard can that be? Really bloody hard, as we all know. And that’s just the beginning of the journey. There are so many obstacles. I’d rather be able to tell people I’ve published a book, than that I’m thinking of publishing one.
But, I did it. I confessed my secret to my line manager. She signed off my form. It’s still with HR, but I can’t see any reason why the application will be rejected.
First step on the rest of the journey done!